As the world reels from the tragedy in Norway, I have found myself thinking a lot about peace, as a concept.
When something this terrible happens, it is easy to feel overwhelmed. To throw up your hands and say, "what in the world could I possibly do to prevent this kind of situation?"
Mother Teresa was once asked, "What can we do to promote world peace?" She simply replied, "Go home, and love your family." A short, two-step instruction, six words long. However, it is the answer to the question. Take a moment and imagine what would change in this world if every single person focused on loving their family and the ones around them. Doing kind things for each other, feeling compassion for another's trials, and just genuinely enjoying their company.
Although my gut reaction to this awful, awful event was one of complete insignificance, I'm going to commit myself to adding a little peace into my own life. Maybe it won't make a difference. But maybe it will. and regardless, I know that I will be heading in the right direction.
I encourage you to take a similar stance. Try to think of ways that you can add peace to your life. Forgive an old enemy. Look for value and joy in each person you meet. Remember that everyone has private battles and that everyone deserves compassion and a kind word. In the face of this tragedy, show the world that you will not allow such evil into your heart.
July 23, 2011
June 12, 2011
If you say so, Cupid.
As a single girl who feels like she has met all the local prospects, I recently turned to online dating, along with a good friend. We've been on the site about 5 months and have met a few people. But mainly, we have learned a lot about the broad range of, let's say girl-getting abilities, of men on the online-dating scene. As such, we have compiled a list of tips for the online guy-about-town to help him fetch the woman of his dreams.
-Read the girl's profile. I don't like animals. And I say this, clearly, in my profile. However, that does not restrain boys from sending me all sorts of messages about how great their dogs are, and how they can't wait for me to meet their dogs. Also, asking a list of questions that could all have been easily answered by looking at more than my picture, is just bothersome.
-A good opening is key. "Hey." "What's up?" and "How ya doin'" as the only content of the message are all signals that the person writing the message probably has difficulty keeping up a conversation, and maybe communicates mostly in grunts and pointing.
-Creativity gives you bonus points. Although any girl will be flattered by "gosh, your smile is so pretty! Let's talk and be friends," she will be so much more charmed if you can make a joke that references one of her interests, or if you share information that isn't already in your profile.
-Don't ask her why she's single. The only possible responses to that question will embarrass her and make you lose interest. If she's being honest and replies "I have 13 cats" or "I seem cute at first but then morph into a clingy whiny awful person," then the relationship effectively stalls at the starting gate.
-Be polite. Don't make disparaging remarks about interests or future career goals. No one likes to be insulted, and online insults are just gross. Stop this immediately.
-Pictures. Wear clothes, first of all. Next, find someone to take your picture or at the very VERY least never again take one in front of the bathroom mirror. Additionally, if you are in your bedroom taking this picture- clean up! Girls don't want to see your dirty laundry and old dishes in the background of your photo. Finally, this should go without saying, but don't post pictures of you with your ex-girlfriend. We don't want to see you kissing other girls, unless you're giving mouth-to-mouth because you are a certified EMT.
-Grammar is your secret weapon. No girl is intrigued by a man who sends a message as follows "hey hows it goin im steve* btw". Capitalization, punctuation, spelling, and sentences with a beginning, middle, and end are all crucial elements when writing messages that girls will respond to.
*names changed to protect the illiterate
-Don't over-share. Too many guys begin their profile with a rant, a whine, or a warning. All of these should be avoided. Beginning your profile with a rant automatically makes you seem confrontational and aggressive, neither of which are oft-desired qualities. Actual example of a rant- "so sick of girls who can't just stay with the great man who would give them everything if they only gave them half a chance and didn't run around with every other guy in town."
As for the whine, my personal favorite is "I'm still hung up on my last girl. She was my one and only, and I don't think that I will ever be able to love again. So don't expect me to be able to fall for you." Then why are you on a dating site, may I ask? Also, lists of why all girls are awful is also a terrible way to begin.
And finally, the warning. "I recently gained a lot of weight so I've begun a new exercise program," really just says to us "Ignore all of the photos I have on here, as they are about a year old. But don't worry! I spent a ton of money on P90X and I may even do it once or twice!"
This post may be the first in a series. Every time I think I've seen it all, some guy steps up to the plate and amazes me once again.
However, don't get me wrong! Overall, online dating has been a great experience. I've met tons of cool people and even a few of those in person. I always proceed with utmost regard for my safety, and although not every message I receive is from the ideal guy, online dating is nothing if not entertaining. I would definitely recommend it to anyone looking for love, or a whole inbox full of fun and flattering messages!
-Read the girl's profile. I don't like animals. And I say this, clearly, in my profile. However, that does not restrain boys from sending me all sorts of messages about how great their dogs are, and how they can't wait for me to meet their dogs. Also, asking a list of questions that could all have been easily answered by looking at more than my picture, is just bothersome.
-A good opening is key. "Hey." "What's up?" and "How ya doin'" as the only content of the message are all signals that the person writing the message probably has difficulty keeping up a conversation, and maybe communicates mostly in grunts and pointing.
-Creativity gives you bonus points. Although any girl will be flattered by "gosh, your smile is so pretty! Let's talk and be friends," she will be so much more charmed if you can make a joke that references one of her interests, or if you share information that isn't already in your profile.
-Don't ask her why she's single. The only possible responses to that question will embarrass her and make you lose interest. If she's being honest and replies "I have 13 cats" or "I seem cute at first but then morph into a clingy whiny awful person," then the relationship effectively stalls at the starting gate.
-Be polite. Don't make disparaging remarks about interests or future career goals. No one likes to be insulted, and online insults are just gross. Stop this immediately.
-Pictures. Wear clothes, first of all. Next, find someone to take your picture or at the very VERY least never again take one in front of the bathroom mirror. Additionally, if you are in your bedroom taking this picture- clean up! Girls don't want to see your dirty laundry and old dishes in the background of your photo. Finally, this should go without saying, but don't post pictures of you with your ex-girlfriend. We don't want to see you kissing other girls, unless you're giving mouth-to-mouth because you are a certified EMT.
-Grammar is your secret weapon. No girl is intrigued by a man who sends a message as follows "hey hows it goin im steve* btw". Capitalization, punctuation, spelling, and sentences with a beginning, middle, and end are all crucial elements when writing messages that girls will respond to.
*names changed to protect the illiterate
-Don't over-share. Too many guys begin their profile with a rant, a whine, or a warning. All of these should be avoided. Beginning your profile with a rant automatically makes you seem confrontational and aggressive, neither of which are oft-desired qualities. Actual example of a rant- "so sick of girls who can't just stay with the great man who would give them everything if they only gave them half a chance and didn't run around with every other guy in town."
As for the whine, my personal favorite is "I'm still hung up on my last girl. She was my one and only, and I don't think that I will ever be able to love again. So don't expect me to be able to fall for you." Then why are you on a dating site, may I ask? Also, lists of why all girls are awful is also a terrible way to begin.
And finally, the warning. "I recently gained a lot of weight so I've begun a new exercise program," really just says to us "Ignore all of the photos I have on here, as they are about a year old. But don't worry! I spent a ton of money on P90X and I may even do it once or twice!"
This post may be the first in a series. Every time I think I've seen it all, some guy steps up to the plate and amazes me once again.
However, don't get me wrong! Overall, online dating has been a great experience. I've met tons of cool people and even a few of those in person. I always proceed with utmost regard for my safety, and although not every message I receive is from the ideal guy, online dating is nothing if not entertaining. I would definitely recommend it to anyone looking for love, or a whole inbox full of fun and flattering messages!
February 28, 2011
Walk, walk fashion baby
As many of you know, I love Polyvore. I've been shopping their sets for a long time. Whenever I get a new article of clothing and I don't know what to wear it with, I head straight to Polyvore. But, it wasn't until today that I started making my own sets. After a few botched attempts, I have finally figured it out and I absolutely love it!! I'm not crafty at all, but Polyvore is definitely something I can handle! Check out what I've made so far!
AND
If you want to start making your own, go here!
AND
If you want to start making your own, go here!
Things I'm doing today
Wearing braids in my hair- feeling very Heidi and 70's simultaneously
Ignoring the rain outside by looking at spring sets on Polyvore
Buying tickets to see Jay Leno! Live! In person!
Rocking out to my new song, Deuces by Chris Brown
Finishing (!) a Review of Literature for a HUGE project
Waiting for Amazon to deliver this book that I ordered- Douglas Adams is just the best
Celebrating that it is finally the last day of February- onto March, ladies and gentlemen!
Planning a St. Patrick's Day party (sans the alcohol-induced insanity- yuck)
I want this and these and of course this
Making hot chocolate- my post-homework treat!
Getting a full 8 hours tonight! (maybe?)
Have a lovely day, all!
Ignoring the rain outside by looking at spring sets on Polyvore
Buying tickets to see Jay Leno! Live! In person!
Rocking out to my new song, Deuces by Chris Brown
Finishing (!) a Review of Literature for a HUGE project
Waiting for Amazon to deliver this book that I ordered- Douglas Adams is just the best
Celebrating that it is finally the last day of February- onto March, ladies and gentlemen!
Planning a St. Patrick's Day party (sans the alcohol-induced insanity- yuck)
I want this and these and of course this
Making hot chocolate- my post-homework treat!
Getting a full 8 hours tonight! (maybe?)
Have a lovely day, all!
February 15, 2011
Bliss
Need I say more?
I hope everyone's Valentine's day was just as wonderful as mine- filled with love, friendships, and some great music!
January 27, 2011
Snow Day!
That's right kids, you read correctly! Today, my school received sooo much ice and snow that we were excused from all our classes! My friends and I stayed in, watched movies, and played Mafia.
I really, really love snow. It's always so soft and pretty, and even sparkles in the sun. I love the challenge of hiking through it when you have to go anywhere, and the way it sticks to my hair and eyelashes when I walk. As far as I can tell, the snow is still falling, and I'm anxious to see how much we end up with! So far we have at least 8 inches and I'm hoping for a foot.
The snow has put a bit of a damper on some of my activities, however. My sorority is hosting recruitment events this week, and they will still be continuing, but the poor girls will have to hike across the campus in all of this snow! Hopefully they all dress warm and in sensible shoes-- frostbite is awful! I can't wait for the first night to see all the girls going through and start meeting some future sisters!
Until my next posting, stay warm, stay safe, and drink lots of hot cocoa!!
I really, really love snow. It's always so soft and pretty, and even sparkles in the sun. I love the challenge of hiking through it when you have to go anywhere, and the way it sticks to my hair and eyelashes when I walk. As far as I can tell, the snow is still falling, and I'm anxious to see how much we end up with! So far we have at least 8 inches and I'm hoping for a foot.
The snow has put a bit of a damper on some of my activities, however. My sorority is hosting recruitment events this week, and they will still be continuing, but the poor girls will have to hike across the campus in all of this snow! Hopefully they all dress warm and in sensible shoes-- frostbite is awful! I can't wait for the first night to see all the girls going through and start meeting some future sisters!
Until my next posting, stay warm, stay safe, and drink lots of hot cocoa!!
January 18, 2011
Ten states in ten days
Hello readers!!
So sorry for the gap between postings, but I have been traveling!! As I am on my winter break, my family and I decided to head down south for a week or so, and it was SUCH an amazing trip!
We left Illinois, traveled through Kentucky, Tennessee, and Alabama on day one. Then we went on through Georgia to Tallahassee to visit JJ, my dear younger-older sister. We toured the FSU campus, ate yummy pizza, enjoyed the gorgeous weather, and watched JJ perform (she's an organist!). After departing Tallahassee, we kept heading south, eventually perching in St. Augustine, where I got my first (got that? First!) view of the ocean. Of course, my dad and I had to dip our toes in the water!
It was unbelievably cold, but also unbelievably gorgeous!! The storms north of us created some crashing waves, and the whole beach was made of shells... perfect for a novice beachcomber like myself.
Next, due to massive amounts of snow and ice across most of the south, we re-routed our trip home and headed on to Biloxi, MS. Being the nerd that I am, I chose this part of the trip so that I could visit Beauvoir, the final home of Jefferson Davis. The house was very majestic, and had been restored to its pre-Katrina glory.
From Mississippi, we turned north and headed up to Memphis! I absolutely adore Elvis and so I was thrilled to get the chance to go through Graceland. I took about 600 pictures and just loved walking where The King had stepped. We also tooled down Beale St before leaving-- we couldn't pass it up!
Now, we're finally back home in Illinois. I have to say, I didn't miss the cold weather or the snow one whit! But, I am happy to be back with my family and friends. And I'll NEVER forget this amazing vacation!!
So sorry for the gap between postings, but I have been traveling!! As I am on my winter break, my family and I decided to head down south for a week or so, and it was SUCH an amazing trip!
We left Illinois, traveled through Kentucky, Tennessee, and Alabama on day one. Then we went on through Georgia to Tallahassee to visit JJ, my dear younger-older sister. We toured the FSU campus, ate yummy pizza, enjoyed the gorgeous weather, and watched JJ perform (she's an organist!). After departing Tallahassee, we kept heading south, eventually perching in St. Augustine, where I got my first (got that? First!) view of the ocean. Of course, my dad and I had to dip our toes in the water!
It was unbelievably cold, but also unbelievably gorgeous!! The storms north of us created some crashing waves, and the whole beach was made of shells... perfect for a novice beachcomber like myself.
Next, due to massive amounts of snow and ice across most of the south, we re-routed our trip home and headed on to Biloxi, MS. Being the nerd that I am, I chose this part of the trip so that I could visit Beauvoir, the final home of Jefferson Davis. The house was very majestic, and had been restored to its pre-Katrina glory.
From Mississippi, we turned north and headed up to Memphis! I absolutely adore Elvis and so I was thrilled to get the chance to go through Graceland. I took about 600 pictures and just loved walking where The King had stepped. We also tooled down Beale St before leaving-- we couldn't pass it up!
Now, we're finally back home in Illinois. I have to say, I didn't miss the cold weather or the snow one whit! But, I am happy to be back with my family and friends. And I'll NEVER forget this amazing vacation!!
January 9, 2011
How to be my boyfriend
Ok, I confess, I stole this idea from an article I read- here. But, I thought it was just too cute, and I wanted to try it for myself. So, here goes.
Dear possible-boyfriends-to-be,
I want you to pursue me. I know it sounds old-fashioned, and I have asked out several guys in my time (some, more successfully than others), but I like to be wanted. I like knowing that you couldn't stand the idea of me being with anyone else, and as such, you just had to make that first move right then and there.
I want you to surprise me. Dinner and a movie is fun, but a cooking lesson and an outdoor amateur play is even better. I'm not typical, and I don't want you to be either. I want to try new things with you, and know that you'll jump in with two feet, right beside me.
You should be a "nice guy." Opening doors, being polite, carrying the groceries, are all little things that I will remember forever (no kidding, I have a great memory.) But, you don't have to laugh at my jokes. I'm used to getting eye rolls and sighs, and I totally understand. I tell bad jokes.
A few things you should probably know about me- I get really excited about everyday things like detours, parking meters, stopping for trains. You don't have to get excited too, just-- be prepared. Also, I really do like just about everything, except vegetables. I'm very laid back and not very discerning, and I'm learning to be more ok with that fact.
I'd prefer you to be kind, friendly, adventurous, and relaxed. I love a good sense of humor, and a good backrub. The ideal applicant would be able to change a tire and bait a hook, as well as enjoy a quality book.
Finally, I want you to accept the love I can show. I have a lot of love to give, and I'd love to give it to you.
Applicants, feel free to leave your information below : )
But in all seriousness, comment with what you look for in a significant other! I'm curious! Although this is kind of a silly exercise and I'm physically blushing just thinking about people reading it, I think it has helped me to clarify exactly what I'm looking for- which, for me, is a good thing.
Dear possible-boyfriends-to-be,
I want you to pursue me. I know it sounds old-fashioned, and I have asked out several guys in my time (some, more successfully than others), but I like to be wanted. I like knowing that you couldn't stand the idea of me being with anyone else, and as such, you just had to make that first move right then and there.
I want you to surprise me. Dinner and a movie is fun, but a cooking lesson and an outdoor amateur play is even better. I'm not typical, and I don't want you to be either. I want to try new things with you, and know that you'll jump in with two feet, right beside me.
You should be a "nice guy." Opening doors, being polite, carrying the groceries, are all little things that I will remember forever (no kidding, I have a great memory.) But, you don't have to laugh at my jokes. I'm used to getting eye rolls and sighs, and I totally understand. I tell bad jokes.
A few things you should probably know about me- I get really excited about everyday things like detours, parking meters, stopping for trains. You don't have to get excited too, just-- be prepared. Also, I really do like just about everything, except vegetables. I'm very laid back and not very discerning, and I'm learning to be more ok with that fact.
I'd prefer you to be kind, friendly, adventurous, and relaxed. I love a good sense of humor, and a good backrub. The ideal applicant would be able to change a tire and bait a hook, as well as enjoy a quality book.
Finally, I want you to accept the love I can show. I have a lot of love to give, and I'd love to give it to you.
Applicants, feel free to leave your information below : )
But in all seriousness, comment with what you look for in a significant other! I'm curious! Although this is kind of a silly exercise and I'm physically blushing just thinking about people reading it, I think it has helped me to clarify exactly what I'm looking for- which, for me, is a good thing.
January 3, 2011
Turn the calendar page
So, like everyone else in the world, I've spent some time the last few days reflecting on the past year, and looking forward to the year ahead. It's great to have this annual reminder to self-assess and to make goals and plans for the future (I'm all about plans- ask me about my plan G sometime).
2010 was a year of learning. I learned a lot about myself, my friends, and my purpose. As always, some of the learning came the hard way, but for stubborn girls like me, sometimes getting hit over the head with a lesson is the best teacher.
This year:
Some 2011 highlights to look forward to
2010 was a year of learning. I learned a lot about myself, my friends, and my purpose. As always, some of the learning came the hard way, but for stubborn girls like me, sometimes getting hit over the head with a lesson is the best teacher.
This year:
- I lost a friend
- My heart was broken a couple of times
- I had more than one sleepless night
- I moved into my sorority house
- I lived away from home for the whole summer
- I got closer to several people I had lost contact with
- I had a summer fling
- I joined two online dating websites (lots of laughs, and met a few great guys)
- I turned 21, decided not to drink, and went to a bar for the first time
- My sister and I ran a 5k together
- I sang by myself, in front of people, for the first time ever
Some 2011 highlights to look forward to
- My last year of college! Ah!
- Graduation in December
- Hopefully a summer internship
- My niece starting kindergarten
- Getting my first real-person job
- Apartment-hunting
- My friend Sam's wedding this summer (and maybe Mario's?)
- Finishing my JMS project- a published book if all goes as planned
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